Thursday, April 28, 2016
The goal can only be being able to practise alone. No matter what one wants to learn it's helpful to learn about motivation. There are general tips. Yet everybody has own motivation triggers.
To document the practise is rather a general tool. It's a very good tool.
Perhaps this was the trigger today that made me step on the mat. I wanted to have something to write about my practise.
It was not easy to start. When I woke up, my back ached already. It was difficult to make the bed. Yet the physio therapist recommended not to do relieving postures. Somehow I managed it to make the bed. The more I move the better I feel.
When I practise at home I sprinkle some water in my face and I brush my teeth before I step on the mat. This shall be enough. The shorter the preparations are, the better. There are a lot of activities that can postpone the practise.
And breakfast comes after the practise. This has also something to do with discipline. I get up a bit later these days. This is I'm hungry already. To practise earlier would be good. Yet, whenever I get up, breakfast comes after the practise. As soon as I'm on my mat it's forgotten that I wanted to eat something.
My only goal can be to get back to a regular practise, I repeat myself, but this is it. I trust that strength and flexibility will return. I got so weak that I cannot hold chaturanga dandasana. Even such poses like halasana became difficult. Yet when I stay in the poses, when I breathe evenly, I can get deeper and deeper and the discomfort fades away. I have lost the performance of the asanas, but I use techniques that help me to get back: It's stretching first, before moving into an asana. It's the even breath. It's engaging the muscles, also mula bandha. It's also to enjoy the asanas.
Tomorrow is Friday and I'll do primary. As said: to be on the mat for 90 min is everything. My practise is bumpy, inelegant, heavy, painful, weak. To leave this level behind me a daily practise is supportive.
One cannot separate the goal and the path to that goal. Yet often I observed the tendency that yoginis focus on the outcome. If people are stopped at an asana, they focus on it, of course. I've been there. One gets obsessed only to be allowed to do the next pose.
I remember when I was told: You come up already. (From urdhva dhanurasana). It was more than a feed-back. It was pushy, impatient.
Fact was I was not able to come up. And I didn't care so much. I was happy that I got so close and I trusted that in a few months it will happen. I had not the inner pressure to nail it. But it's difficult to say this as it allows interpretations of not being committed enough and so on.
I learned to focus on the process. The process teaches me a lot. It helps me to understand the asanas. In my case now with this injured SI joint nothing else is possible. It's difficult enough to practise.
To fly high again comes later.
In a few days I'll celebrate my 57th birthday.
At this age my priorities are not to nail one single asana, I want to keep practicing without injuries. It shall be fun, that is I also want some variety in my practice. This is possible. But it's not possible if there is no room in classes for a tiny bit of individuality and flexibility.
Wednesday, April 27, 2016
It was 9am when I started my Ashtanga yoga practise. I lost strength and flexibility. I'll gain it back. So what.
The joy that I could come up from Trikonasana on both sides dominated every other feeling. My back allowed me this movement without pain.
I simply must keep practicing. Afterwards I felt so good. I hope I can still say this when I wake up tomorrow morning.
My program today:
- Surya namaskara
- All standing asanas
- Second series till ustrasana
- Could lift me up to urdhva dhanurasana
- Closing sequence
This is a lot. I practiced sooooo sloooooowly. Attention and an even breath is more important than rushing through all the asanas.
It's motivating to document the own practise. I need this support. So, yep, I practiced.
I set a timer for 90 minutes. The asana practise shall not be longer. It's enough if one does the wright things. So till tomorrow.
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
Today I was at the orthopaedic. I wanted a new prescription for six more treatments at the physio therapist. I got it.
My back is better, but I'm not pain free. To sit longer doesn't feel good.
The physio therapist and the doctor motivate me to start again with my yoga practice.
The doctor: "Much more people who sit on the sofa have back issues than those who move."
The message: Move. Don't take the pain so seriously. Take care, but move.
My thinking: Wait long enough and the body heals itself. This is so often so.
I'll make a cut.
It's difficult to start again. I got weak and stiff. I know it's better to practice as modest it will be.
There will be a come back.....
Thursday, April 07, 2016
I stopped practicing yoga for a while. It seemed to me that pain fades away when I don't practise. Quickly I got stiff. The hope was that my body would reposition itself that way. Of course I moved a lot, I walked a lot i.e., yet I didn't stretch.
During my vacation my back got better and better. I had to laugh, because I mailed to a friend that I postpone the pain till I'll be back home. Exactly that happened. At home again my back started aching. In sum I think all gets better. But it's not stable.
As I had to interrupt the physio therapy due to my influenza and due to the vacation I had to renew the prescription. I met my physio therapist, I always love to talk to her. She always has bits of information that is useful to me. What astonished me i.e. was that my back gets worse when I'm in bed, not moving.
The explanation: My body is in a malposition. When the muscles are active they stabilize the body and bring it in a good position. Yet when they relax the body moves in the malposition. This aches.
And why do I have a malposition: Right leg first. right leg first. always right leg first, even when I do so intensive asanas like supta kurmasana (both legs behind the head). Also padmasana, lotus pose is an advanced asana. My body was balanced when I altered legs. Yet in the shala in India it's right leg first and so the teacher have to forward it. This is the Ashtanga rule. Yet when rules ruin the body, they must be changed!
I started with strength training, too. I'll write later about it.
Ashtanga yoga makes the body flexible. The body also gets stronger, but not strong enough to keep the body in balance.
Tomorrow I want to start again with the sun salutations and a short, the standing sequence and then I shall see how I feel. To do headstand and lotus pose seems to be a perfect end.
Today was new moon, a rest day, another rest day for me. Tomorrow is primary on the schedule, on Saturday is again a day off. This is great to have a day off after a first practice after a long break. This is my plan. I hope it's not too early to challenge the body with stretching activities. Mentally I feel ready. I will start as soft as it's possible for me.