The winter season has started. All the ski bunnies left their holes to show up on the slope.....äh, I mean of course, all the yoginis schleppt themselves to the shala for some stretching and sweating on the rubber mat.
The shala was full this morning. Our M was in action again, present, freshly inspired. Most of us were shown a new upper back opening exercise. I'll take a picture of it soon.
My practice was excellent. Asana highlights pleased me along the way. My legs remained where they should without holding them when I practiced eka pada sirsasana. My neighbour, a new yogini, whispered: "This was good". in my direction. Yeah, I thought the same.
My mind fictions for the time being are so exciting that I forgot eating yesterday. My practice forecast on my scales this morning told me already that it will become likely a bendy practice. And so it was. I felt so flexible. I considered my practice also as wonderful as I was able to mobilize my strength. I had focus. My practice was intensive, I was able to practice to my limits. It was not faking around.
Nevertheless if one thought should accompany my practice next time it shall be the thought: let it happen. Being active and passive at the same time needn't be a contradiction. Fighting hasn't brought the successes I wished that I aimed for. All the effort must be accompanied with some lightness. Effort as an art that stand for itself alone. One must trust that the action executed day in day out, will finally bring a result. What for a result? This is always a surprise.....hahahahah.......
I have to find a solution to maintain this morning practices. Shall I focus on money-making activities in the afternoon and only in the afternoon. (This topic is a permanent topic, I know. ) I'm so motivated again and also optimistic that I manage this. The joy that I felt this morning when I practiced told me: this is it for me. This shall be part of my every day life, this Ashtanga practice. This shall go on. I don't want that this changes.
Today I was diligent off the mat, too. Duties were done. This year I'll still work on my book, my soap bubbles, my fantasies, my pictures. In December I'll prepare my cv to apply for an accounting job, part time. This is at least my latest soap bubble, my future planning for the next year. Back to what is now.
I feel good.
I feel like meditating for 10 minutes. I like to observe the arising and disappearing thoughts. There are so many DVDs in my mind, favorite ones, horror movies, road movies. love stories. But focus shall also be my breath when I sit. I want to observe. I want to let go and return to ......inhaling, exhaling....again and again.