Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Mysore class - this was the best today

Mysore class this evening. We were 5 students today. I was jazzed. I forgot to do mari c and d. I remembered these poses after bujapidasana. Then I did mari c and d, it was a different order than the given one, but who cares. It showed me that the mind was absent from time to time. The body was flexible, incredible flexible. I hadn't eaten much today, I couldn't. Late in the afternoon I ate a salsa sandwich, this was it. Supta kurmasana was great today. And urdhva dhanurasana was great today, too. Three times I walked the hands closer to the feet. This is not easy. But I walked the hands closer to the feet and again and again. Pashasana was with B.'s help great, too. My body was soft, no resistance was felt.

It was still warm outside when the class was over. I walked home, slowly, enjoying the warm air. People were sitting outside the restaurants, having dinner and drinks. It was as if we had a last summer day.
Now I am at home. If I didn't practice, it would have been a totally lost day. I feel heavy, pessimistic. Soon I will sit in front of the TV, switching from channel to channel, feeling bored. Nevertheless more is not possible today. I will look at my frustration, that I allowed others to spoil my day. I will examine how it looks like to feel paralysed, depressed, unable to move, feeling unable to do anything. I hope my inability to do anything also includes not to open the bottle of white wine. Tomorrow I will insert a fun day. No duties tomorrow, only self-love. I make this a programme.

Then life goes on. Tomorrow bf will be back from Serbia. On Friday we will drive to the book fair in Frankfourt. I won't be at home during the weekend. I will be on the road again.....


Anna said...

We want the people we love to be happy - and we keep hoping and hoping they will be... and when they can't seem to be, it's devastating.
You are full of humour - try and see the funny side of it. At least you never did what my friend's husband did when he was being the photographer at a christening. He got in an argument with his wife and threw the camera at her. He was too frightened to tell the parents and the photos of the event were ruined! They never spoke to him again!

Ursula said...

Thank you for the story. It made me laugh. The first time today.

Yeah, so it is.

Let me add something, too: At the wedding of my parents the sister of my father was supposed to take the pictures. She took pictures, but without a film in her camera. So my parents do not have pictures from their wedding party. They are still not over it. I always think that I am glad that I was not yet born.

I cannot see so much love in families, but problems, problems, problems and neurosis, all sorts of neurosis. This can be really funny. It is theatre, show.

Monica said...

This made me laugh - the missing film in the camera. Family dramas can be quite entertaining. But something is telling me that it was not only you that forgot to take the picture of them together.. something tells me that the objects didn't turn up..

What if you use photoshop or another program and cut then from different pictures and than create a new one? Or even just a scissor and a copymaschine and send them. Maybe you will have some fun then..

I use to visit the book fair in Frankfourt every year when I worked as a book editor. But after I started as a freelance I don't go. It's great to be there and have a nice and a relaxing time with E.

Ursula said...

Hi Monica, that would have been nice to meet you again. But I also understand that it is a too far trip from Norway now.

You are so right, the objects didn't turn up. They were always busy with different guests.

Family dramas are entertaining, when not involved.......

I wanted to give them a voucher for a photografer. But I am so fed up with everything. I expected the drama, but not that massive.

I must find a way back to a daily routine. I have so much to do.