I arrived at work and the first activity was to make a phone call to B. I wanted to make sure that the Mysore class would take place today. And it took place.
B.: "Yes, today is Mysore class and you can buy also a tee-shirts. I have a nice one for you. I still need some money for my Indian trip."
I liked this honesty so much.
Me: "OK, I will buy a tee-shirt today. I like it when you are such an enterprising yogini."
Mysore class was great. I had a very good concentration. I was into the asana. Now I know when an asana is almost perfect: when the feeling comes up that one likes to sleep in that position. And there were some asanas where I could totally relax. I was so relaxed and at the same time able to give so much energy to my practice. It couldn't have been better. I felt happy, yes this rare feeling came up. Most things of my life need construction, but now I was on my mat and I was happy there. Me, the group (2 nice other women and B.) enjoyed our time there. A paradise.
I went out of the house this morning, indifferent and I went home so much richer: I had a wonderful practice and I have two tee-shirts and a pair of trousers now (all very beautiful).
Now is one of the rare moments where I'd like to smoke a cigarette. Of course I won't smoke. I don't even know where to buy cigarettes. And I don't want to smoke again. But the picture is alive now. Strange. Me sitting here, relaxing with a cigarette. No, I forbid this for me. I'm so happy that I'm over it.
I will upload a picture even though it will be too loud and intrusive. I want to have a modest blog, not a crying one. This blog is for me, to keep me going. I want to go on with Ashtanga yoga and I know that it is not always easy. And then I need the blog and the community. I don't want to bother others with my space-consuming pictures.
How shall I survive this winter. I don't know.
Work: sometimes there is almost nothing to do. This is as bad as to have too much to do. It is so exhausting. Always guilty that I should do something, but I don't know what. 9 long hours sitting on a chair. I sit now in half lotus. My pair of trousers do not allow more. But I also see me sitting there in padmasana.
Picture: Barcelona, Spain (doors to go through)