......how I wished I started my day.
Bf went to bed a bit later than me, a bit after 10 p.m.. It's difficult for him to be quite when going to bed. I woke up again and I had difficulties to sleep in. This morning he had to get up at 4 a.m. He had to fly to the Netherlands. I woke up. too. At 5 a.m. then I was very tired. I wrote my morning pages and meditated. I know it, when I keep my eyes closed during meditation, I am so tired that it is better to go to bed again. And that' s what I did. I gave me another hour sleep. No yoga, only a few surya namaskaras a. I
have to go to bed earlier. It expects me a 10 hours day at least. And this won't change for the next weeks. I see that I won't be able to do all the stuff that must be done. Catastrophe grows in front of me. And the week has only 4 days. The next week has only 4 days, too. It might have all a larger sense. Fact is I feel pressure, a lot of pressure. And then this awful tiredness. I could cry.
Thoughts during meditation circled around the job and my bf. At least I could sit. I was able to try to observe and not to act panically.
I want to lie under bed stuff, I want to have it warm and I want to sleep, sleep, sleep.