Five o'clock seemed to be rather early this morning. I got up and started my routine.
I see the necessity of fine tuning my morning routine: Emails must be read after the yoga practice. I will limit meditation to 15 min. I can sit 15 min in lotus pose, afterwards I struggle with pinholes and cold feet. I doubt that this is the intention of the practice. It might be that retention of the senses can be exercised when pinholes and cold feet happen. But at the moment I try something else. During sitting I try to be aware of what happens, I try to let go of the coming thoughts and I try to enjoy the quite time with myself. 15 min shall be enough for now. This can be changed anytime. This won 5 min help me to be more relaxed, because I can start yoga on time.
I practiced the first series rather fast. I wanted to do as much poses as possible. It was somehow a desperate practice. I was like someone who was drowning and this last practice should save her. Not every pose looked nice today. So what. I was on my mat.
And now some thoughts on my job. I feel as if I have already lost the battle, but I'm still fighting. I read yesterday (From onions to pearls by Satyam Nadeen), that it is good to let go and that we are only a marionette, means we cannot do anything to avoid our fate. However. Perhaps the "Source" wants me still to fight a bit. I need a fight plan and here it is.
No coffee, but water during the day. I will go to bed half an hour earlier, I need more sleep to recover. I will write in my calender what I do during the day. Each half hour I will see if anything is done. I will take care of breaks. I will work longer. I guess I won't be able to leave the company before 7. I've heard that my colleagues even come during the weekend. To stay till 8 is normal. I will stay till 7. And the attitude is important: I want to stay relaxed.
Let's see if I can avoid the inevitable.
Time to have breakfast.