Reading spiritual books I learned, that awareness seems to be a key "activity".
But why to be aware? There is the assumption that most people live unconsciously. They do what they have learned from someone, who didn't know it better either. So life seems to be a repetition of the life of others. This must be observed to be able to drop it. The goal is to live the own life.
But how? It might be helpful to be aware when life gets tough, but I'm not really able to be aware when I feel stress. Choices to act/speak/not speak seem to be minimized.
Repetition: To learn new behaviour repetition is necessary. If I do no repeat anything, I just forget what I wanted to do. I want to begin with little steps and with an activity which is not that difficult. So I thought it could be a good idea to observe, to be aware when I eat. I eat several times during the day. I have a repetition. To observe how I eat is much easier than to be aware in a "difficult" conversation i.e.
But what do I like to observe? As we (human beings) are only able to experience life through our senses it might be observed what is to be seen, what is to be heard, what is to be tasted, what is to be felt, what is to me smelled. Feelings? Thoughts?
I start this experiment now.
This morning I ate rather unaware my banana with sojayofu and golden raisins. I walked around in my home, again nervous as so often, bowl was in my hand, while I gave me the food, one spoon after the other. As I was unaware it was probably too much what I ate. Banana was very large (hahaha). I feel too full now (hahaha). Life can be so funny.
I better pick up my boyfriend from the airport.